


Office Wars

by JustLikeTomo



Category: One Direction (Band)
Genre: Alternate Universe - Office, Crack, M/M, Prank Wars
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2018-06-29
Updated: 2018-06-29
Packaged: 2019-05-30 14:48:55
Rating: Not Rated
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,306
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/15098972
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/JustLikeTomo/pseuds/JustLikeTomo
Summary: Harry and Louis work in the same office and are sworn enemies.Shenanigans ensue.





	Office Wars

**Author's Note:**

> This is just a silly little ficlet, so enjoy and don't judge. Happy reading!

Louis Tomlinson is the bane of Harry Styles’ existence.

They work in a fairly large office; one of those horrible corporate ones with grey cubicles in clusters of four, spread across a floor that almost feels industrial sized when making your way to the nearest tea and coffee station.

It’s not a fun job and honestly, Harry’s not even sure what Louis does, whether it’s the same dreary typing of numbers into a Microsoft Excel spreadsheet, or something equally as dull. Either way, it doesn’t matter.

What matters is that Louis Tomlinson is Harry Styles’ sworn enemy.

What matters is that Louis and Harry have been in a constant battle for months now and regardless of who or how it started, Harry has promised himself that he’ll win it, even if it nearly kills him.

Harry is not sure when it actually began.

Perhaps it was when Harry accidentally spilled coffee over Louis’ new white shirt and blue tie.

Or maybe it was when Louis drank Harry’s diet coke from the office fridge.

It could be when Harry tripped and knocked a load of Louis’ paperwork on the floor.

It could also be when Louis practically drove into the side of Harry’s car to make sure he got the last available parking space, forcing Harry to drive to the car park a few streets over and walk back. Harry had lost fifteen minutes pay for being late and had glared daggers at Louis all day. It wasn’t really his fault if he stretched his long legs out just in time for Louis to trip over them and practically starfish on the floor.

Whatever.

Accidents happen.

Niall has tried broaching the subject to him over a pint after work, but Harry never knows what to tell him without sounding like a complete twat.

“But like, I just don’t get it. You don’t even speak,” Niall says.

“Don’t need to. He’s a dick.”

“You two literally make no sense. He said exactly the same thing.”

“Since when do you two speak? Niall, you can’t fraternize with the enemy!”

Niall rolls his eyes. “Look, mate. Louis’ a good lad. Did you two have a bad shag or something? Is that it?”

Harry spits out his beer and wipes his mouth with the back of his hand, grimacing. “Gross. Of course not. I’d never sleep with him in a million years.”

“So you don’t think he’s hot?”

“No, I fucking don’t.”

“He’s exactly your type.”

“I don’t know what you’re talking about,” Harry says, turning his nose up.

“Idiots, the both of you,” Niall mutters.

**

They nearly have another collision in the car park.

Harry left his flat five minutes early this morning to make sure he gets his parking space and no sooner has he parked than there is a loud beeping of a car horn. Harry opens his car door and peeks out, smirking when he sees Louis glaring at him through the windscreen. Harry shrugs as if saying, _sorry, mate, but what can you do?_

It should be expected then when Harry gets to his desk after a trip to the toilet that afternoon to find staples scattered over his keyboard and a sticky note stuck to his computer screen.

_DICKHEAD_

Harry rolls his eyes and sits down with an angry huff. It takes him the next twenty minutes to get all the staples out.

**

_STOP THROWING AWAY MY SALAD_

Harry puts the sticky note on Louis’ desk as he comes back from the kitchen, fists clenched in anger. It’s the third time this week that his lunch has gone missing, only to find it in the bin.

“Well, maybe he doesn’t agree with a healthy lifestyle,” Harry’s mum says on the phone. Harry can tell she’s trying not to laugh and he hangs up.

**

_YOUR HAIR LOOKS RIDICULOUS WEAR A FUCKING HAT_

**

It’s a busy day and Harry is immersed in his spreadsheet when he feels something hit him on the forehead. He looks down at the tiny ball of paper that’s on his desk and when he looks up, he’s hit again.

Spitballs.

Louis is firing spitballs at him.

Harry waits until Louis goes to make tea and then writes another sticky note:

_I’D FIRE BACK BUT YOU’RE SO SHORT I CAN’T EVEN SEE YOU_

He probably shouldn’t feel as proud as he does.

He doesn’t feel quite so victorious when he comes back to his desk after a toilet break to find his potted plant on its side, soil everywhere.

Fucking Louis.

**

Harry is trying not to laugh. He’s really trying, but he can feel himself going red in the face.

He’s having a quiet chat with Babs in the cubicle next to his and he’s rocking and rolling backwards and forwards in his chair, listening to Louis huff and grumble at the sound of the loud squeaking the chair is making.

“Are you okay, Harry?” Babs asks. “You’ve gone a little pink.”

“Oh, I’m perfect. Just a little warm.”

Babs smiles at him, patting his cheek. “Well, you look lovely.”

“Oh for fuck’s sake,” he hears Louis mutter.

_Squeak. Squeak. Squeak._

“Stop it!” Louis suddenly yells.

It goes quiet in the office and Louis’ slim chest is rising and falling quickly, his eyes a little wild. Harry and Babs lean to the side to see him better, Babs frowning, Harry smirking.

“You okay, Lou?” Babs asks.

“Fine, just a problem with a formula,” Louis says, but his eyes are having a whole other conversation, locked with Harry’s.

“Want some help, love?” she asks him.

“I’m okay. Just going to take a breather I think.”

Babs turns to look at Harry when Louis storms off. “Wonder what’s up with him.”

“Dunno,” Harry says, shrugging.

**

Things have been going missing.

One day, Harry comes into the office to find he’s missing his stapler.

The next day, his paper has gone.

The day after, his favourite pink glitter pen isn’t in his drawer.

Each day, something new is gone. It doesn’t matter that Harry replaces them because by the following day they’re gone again.

Louis has been looking more and more smug and Harry _knows._

It goes on for a week. A whole fucking week.

Harry snaps.

**

“You fucker,” Harry says.

Louis looks up from his computer, eyes wide in shock.

“You fucker,” Harry repeats.

Louis stands up and it must look a little ridiculous, both of them glaring at each other over the top of their work cubicles, but this whole thing is ridiculous anyway.

“What did you say?”

“You-“

“What the hell is wrong with you?”

“You stole my fucking stapler, you twat. For the third time this week!” Harry sounds a little shrill, but he can’t find it in himself to care.

“So?”

“So you’re a fucking dick.”

Louis snorts. “You’re one to talk, you twat.”

“What have I done?”

“Oh, don’t even get me started, mate,” Louis says, puffing up his chest.

They yell back and forth, getting more and more heated, both of them red in the face. Harry doesn’t think he’s ever been this mad before, honestly.

“YOU WANNA FUCK?” he suddenly yells and there’s silence in the office and no, no, no, that’s not what he was trying to say! He was going to say, “you wanna fight?” but he was also gonna say, “fuck you,” and it got mixed up and _fuck._

Louis is breathing heavily, but his eyes have dropped to Harry’s lips and…

“Now?”

Harry’s eyes bug out of his head and he stutters, his hands waving around. “What?”

“I’ve wanted to get down on my knees for you forever, so if you want to get out of here…”

“Okay, okay, yeah.”

**

It makes for a great story at Harry and Louis’ wedding three years later.

Meet uglies are so much better than meet cutes anyway.

**Author's Note:**

> You can find me on twitter [here](https://twitter.com/JustLikeTomo)


End file.
